My Mom might strangle me if she knew I was putting this out there, but I wonder what your take on this is.  Please comment!

My Mom attends a very small (in size and membership) church.  One night at the ladies bible study group the topic of the church Christmas tree came up.  All the ladies were commenting on how old and tattered it is.  My Mom chimed in and said, “I have a tree that we no longer use that I would be happy to donate to the church.”  Oh!  All the ladies were so happy.  When the preacher’s wife (PW) joined the group, my Mom summarized the conversation and said, “I would be happy to donate the tree.”  She even offered to store it at her house if the church didn’t have room.

PW said, “Well, we will have to run this by the deacons.”

Confused, my Mom said, “I’m donating, not selling it.”

PW said, “We will still have to run it by the deacons.”

Several of the ladies chimed in asking why and commenting that they can surely accept donations without approval from the deacons.  I think it must have gotten a little heated because my Mom ended up saying, “Never mind.  I’ll keep the tree.  I didn’t realize this would be an issue.”

That night, the preacher called my Mom and said, “I understand there was a disagreement at the ladies bible group and some feelings got hurt.”

My Mom wondered whose feelings, because it certainly wasn’t hers.

The whole thing seemed absurd to me.

  1. The preacher calling about “feeling being hurt” felt like the principal calling about a school incident
  2. If donations really need to be approved:
    1.  PW could have simply said “Thank you, I will let Pastor know.”
    2. An explanation for the deacons approval could have been given
  3. When everyone started chiming in, the person running the meeting could have said “Let’s get started” to stop the discussion – before feelings were hurt


Honestly, no good deed…